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[07 Feb 2007|09:43pm] |
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HI!! hows everyone doing? i'm stressed up the ass. i have a job interview tomorrow, thank god. my birthday is tomorrow and honestly, dont care. i just want to go to nevada and start my life. i already have roommates (awsome people) and i already have a car, i just need to get some more cash and i'm done. probably by next month. other than that, everything is fine. cant go to grad night, nore ultra, nore to cirque du soleil.. BUT! i will be able to be with the love of my life. i'm excited. so! anyone wanna chip in to the "Get Desiree with her soul mate" Foundation?! anyway, hope everyone is doing well. laters!
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[06 Dec 2006|08:31pm] |
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dear world... make it all go away...
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[07 Aug 2006|02:05pm] |
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mood |
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tired |
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depression... what a sneaky little booger.
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[08 Jul 2006|01:31am] |
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[11 Apr 2006|03:16pm] |
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mood |
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 mellow |
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music |
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a perfect circle- count the bodies |
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i've been hanging out with people lately and it feels pretty god. i hope it keeps up.
megan made me take off all my bracelets. at first i couldnt understand why but when i took them all off i did... it felt so weird and not because i didnt have them on but because i saw waht megan was trying to show me.
i hide behind my bracelets. weird, i know. but i do. they cover my scars, so i pretend that the past never happened making me feel stronger. but when i see them i think that everyone is looking at them and i feel so insecure and so small... when i took them off i couldnt help but cry. she just wanted me to take them off for one day.. but i came to realize what i was doing and i made the decision not to put them back on.. im going on to three days without them and to be honest i feel good about myself. i dont like hiding behind material shit...
i went to the beach last night with megan, cameron, jc and tye and for some reason i felt so fucking free. i started running around and jumping off the life guard house into a hill of sand...
im not afraid of change. i just need a little push once and a while to make changes... i cant do it all by myself. i've come a long way, but there are certain times i need someone there to hold my hand and help me through.. i know im strong, and i dont need to prove it to anyone. being strong isnt doing everything without being afraid, or doing it by yourself.. its admiting what scares you and being able to understand that you cant take the world on by yourself. its knwoing when to ask for help without feeling ashamed....
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[05 Apr 2006|05:10pm] |
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mood |
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 sad |
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music |
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wasteland - 10 years |
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i decided to have a BOS on lj.. friends only but here is the link if you want to be able to read it. Its about Wicca so if you dont have anything nice to say about it, i wont add you.
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) violet_lead
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[22 Sep 2005|09:39pm] |
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[18 Jan 2005|06:26pm] |
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mood |
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 gloomy |
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music |
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fear factor theme |
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hey guys. whats up? nothing much, here supposed to be doing my homework but i dont feel like it. this weekend was pretty cool. i spent most of it with stephi and most of it fighting with jess. but we are cool now. my uncle is living with me now. he..uhh.. is different. he came down here from new jersey so he is already bored out of his mind. ive been kinda shitty the past two weeks but ive managed to get my hands on resources to make me feel better. ummm... what else can i say? blah. joe and i are pretty close now. ugh! i have P.E! NO! I AM MOST DEF. NOT A SPORTY PERSON! I COULD NOT RUN A MILE FOR MY LIFE! blah! anyway, im broke so i dont have the money for the uniform so i wont be dressing out for a while. i got my 'eat ball' (as stephi called it) pierced but my mom saw it and she freaked out on me and told me to take it off. blah. anyway. well, im gonna go. ill talk to you guys later. bye
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[09 Jan 2005|03:09pm] |
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mood |
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 happy |
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hey guys. im here, sitting home thinking about all this shit going on. my mom and step dad are getting divorced... that means that we are moving and we are going to go threw rougher times now. to be honest i dont really care. my mom said that we will move closer to school but u never know because my mom is always changing her mind. im not even going to tell anyone cause i dont feel like explaining shit to anyone... ive been like that alot lately. i dont talk about anything only because i dont feel like explaining anything to anyone. jess gets back from new york today. ummm... dammit. i had so much to say before but now i dont... make sense? um... yeah. JESSICA IS HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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[30 Dec 2004|09:24pm] |
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mood |
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gloomy |
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music |
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nada |
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hey guys. im still breathing. not really a journal updating person anymore (other than my real journal). anywayz. i might cut my hair real short... i mean REALLY short. i dont know yet. im going to look for hair do's now so. umm...er... me and jess are still very very close. now me and pnut are really close. i finally admitted that im bisexual...after two years. justin, fitzroy, and anthony are always say stupid jokes about it, but i dont give a shit. they can kiss my ass. umm... what else? i had an awsome time at disney... almost passed out during our performance. the hotel was a pain in my royal as though... dont know what else to tell ya.
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[22 Nov 2004|09:59pm] |
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tired |
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music |
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the early november- something that produces results |
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armando left... armando left.... ARMANDO LEFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! alfonso too but i dont care about him, ARMANDO LEFT!!!!!!!!!!!!! things have been so different without armando... *tear* i havent been in the mood for anything... jessica said im starting to change again.... that im not my weird self anymore. today i noticed that because i was sitting in 4th period today and every one was being weird and loud like always but for some reason, today they were really getting on my last nerve. they were being loud and stupid like always, but i had to move or else i was going to turn around and punch the stupid colombian girl that sits behind me and all she talks about is her butt. she laughs at the dumbess shit and her laugh is so freakin annoying!!! ugh! well, ive been TRYING to look nice the past four days but uh.... i dont think its working. Lorena thinks i look nice though. Aline and I arent talking much anymore. Lorena and I are close now. we are the weirdest together. We have our own song and everything. lol. sarah and i talked and we had a good convo. i always get happy when i talk to her for some reason, she is a cool person. jessica and i are like glue. i hope i can go to new york with her and i hope she can come to puerto rico with me. i was planning to ask my mom to see if shira and jessica can both come to puerto rico with me on my 16th birthday, but i doubt it. i might move...whatever. maybe ill be able to start all over and stop screwing with people. uh....im so tired i can even think straight. my trip to puerto rico was alright, kinda depressing. it was raining the entire time we were there but i got to hang out wiht my old friends. jeffrey turned goth, which is a major shock since he was always into the whole fashion trend shit. sylmarie hasnt changed at all. luyo is about 5inch taller, lol. jk. but she is pretty damn tall. franchesca looks like a dirty little hoe. glen...well...let just say he went from a tiny flirt into a HUGE FLIRT! alexander pretended he didnt know me only because i wasnt wearing the tiny skirts and skimpy shirts i wore when i lived in puerto rico. but i dont care. he isnt worth my time at all. lets see... BB remembered me, and she pretended as if we were friends since kindergarden. bitch. my mom didnt want to take me to see nelsons grave which really pissed the living fuck out of me. i even spent the rest of the trip with my cousins because i didnt want to see her face. she didnt want to let me go because she thought i was going to get too upset or what ever. well. im gonna go cause i have a LONG ASS night a head of me.
love peace and chicken pooplings
~sexy poop~
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[09 Oct 2004|12:49pm] |
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 bored |
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nothing |
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"Convince me that I've been sick forever"
"They don't hear you singing to me"
"And if I bleed, I'll bleed. Knowing you don't care"
"I want to go back to believing everything and knowing nothing at all"
I've been looking in the mirror for so long That I've come to believe my soul's on the other side Oh the little pieces falling shatter Shards of me too sharp to put back together Too small to matter But big enough to cut me into so many little pieces If I try to touch her And I bleed I bleed And I breathe I breathe no more Take a breath and I try to draw from my spirit's well Yet again you refuse to drink like a stubborn child Lie to me Convince me that I've been sick forever And all of this will make sense when I get better But I know the difference between myself and my reflection I just can't help but to wonder Which of us do you love So I bleed I bleed And I breathe I breathe no- Bleed I bleed And I breathe
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[06 Oct 2004|08:57pm] |
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mood |
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 loved |
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nothing |
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haha. i never saw this comment from sarah and i thought it was the cuttest thing. love ya hun!!!
'haha. no wait, my laughter is louder HAHA. I AM A BIG BOOB. haha hmm idk if i like being a boob, i just sit there all day. ;) lol yes yes, his loss and hopefully he'll realize it when i kick him in his balls. my friend said to kick him so hard he cant pee straight. XD now that shit is funny dude~ we are going to be tight like uhh duct tape, ok? haha BONDAGE jk lol i am having too much fun with this post. someone should stop me. b careful w/ that hurricane. look at the rain! *grabs yr hand and drags you out to splash in puddles* <3333 much love, sarah'
hey...umm... i joined a community and i posted pictures of my cuts. dont go looking for them if ur going to start saying stupid shit to me. only look at them if u want to actually see them to know, and only to know. later...
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[27 Sep 2004|04:09pm] |
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mood |
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blah |
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yesterday i went to the mall with richie and my sister. we got bored so we decided to walk around outside and we got soaked, but it was kinda fun. my sister couldnt run cause her shoes made her slip so it was fun to watch. uhhh...i dont feel like updating anymore. later
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[26 Sep 2004|10:30pm] |
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bored |
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music |
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nothing at all |
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[25 Sep 2004|10:39pm] |
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mood |
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lonely |
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 MINE!!!!!! this is so cute. im bored so im just going to keep putting pictures in...
 my love!
  for some reason, the scar on his lip is alot more sexy then the rest of them...
 MINE MINE MINE!!!!!
this is what maricao looks like (where i used to live)
am bored again, gonna go
bye
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[25 Sep 2004|09:59pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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nothing really |
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im feeling kinda icky right now. this hurricane bull shit is starting to suck real bad. the past week has been alright i guess. ive made a new close friend, Aline. we went to the mall after knowing each other for only two days and we had so much fucking fun. it was as if we have known each other forever. people kept looking at us kinda weird though because we have this thing that we talk to each other as if we were gay and we were dating. idk, and idc. we have so much in common so it makes it alot easier for me to talk to her because i know she understands me in so many different levels. what else can i say?....umm....nothing really. OH! my dad left yesterday!!!!! YAY!!! i dont know how long, but i have to enjoy the time hes gone, right? my mom and me are starting to get along a little bit better. even though she threw a glass at me the other day and i dodged it and it hit the wall and shattered, but other than that its been kinda quite. my great great aunt passed away. yes, i knew her. i lived down the street from her house when i lived in puerto rico actually. i would go to her house once in a while, when i want in the woods hiding in my little spot (god i miss it). but for some reason my mom told be that a while ago and i didnt feel a thing. i feel bad and stuff but nothing i should feel when someone from my family passes away... is that normal? at the bus yesterday i got a terrible pain in my side and it really freaked me out because the last time i got a pain that bad i had to spend on night at the hospital (last summer, about a week before school started) so i freaked cause i really didnt want to got to the hospital again. umm...what else?...blah blah blah....umm... richy hasnt called me in two days, im guessing hes pissed off at me :'( god i hope not. i havent heard from sarah either...well, come to think of it...i havent really heard from anyone that isnt in cshs...this fucking sucks ass! dammit, im alot more icky now. what ever. bye.
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[18 Sep 2004|04:37pm] |
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mood |
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bored |
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music |
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marron 5- she will be loved |
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well, nothing new. umm...im sitting home doing nothing. hopefuly tomorrow ill be able to do something, probably alone cause my friends can never do anything. maybe ill call up nancy and tell her to go out with her husband while i watch the girls....maybe. well, im gonna go read for a while, dont really feel like talking
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